I think everyone needs to come to terms with the fact that lying is a rather useful tool that humans quite naturally use to assist themselves in navigating their social existence. Anyone who does not lie because they “believe” it is wrong, obviously has not thought about all aspects of lying and what it entails.
First of all, making lying WRONG, really does not discourage it at all because the rebelliousness in us causes us to lie just because we are told not to… and then go brag to our friends about how we pulled one over on so and so.
Also, categorizing a person who does not lie as some sort of saint in no way indicates that person is better than anyone else, they just follow rules which society has indicated should be followed.
What really needs to be considered are the reasons people have for choosing to lie or not. Understanding these personal boundaries about people will help you understand when a person is actually trustworthy.
Here is why I choose not to lie:
-It is easier to remember the truth
-I do not want to deal with the repercussions of getting caught in a lie
-It is often illegal and thus could cost me and people I associate with a lot more than if I just told the truth
-I know I can’t keep lies straight, I’ve tried, the more time that goes by the more I forget what I made up…. but i do remember what actually did happen.
-I hate having to go out of my way to clean up unnecessary social messes
Here is why I choose to lie:
-The truth is none of your business
-I am required to keep something a secret, including that the secret exists…. so if you ask about it, I lie so you are not let on that I know that there is a secret.
-It is funny to find out actually how gullible people can be
-I know you are a gossip and that you will tell people what I say, so I tell you what I want everyone else to know…. he he he, plus I think it is funny that you so eagerly propagate lies….. oh oh oh and it is funny to tell the person you gossiped to the truth when they ask me about it.
-Duh, I am hiding something
-I do not want to deal with someone getting their feelings hurt about a situation that really has nothing to do with their everyday life.
So basing your assessment of a person on whether or not they believe lying is wrong or right really tells you nothing about the person. If my reasons for lying scare you, then we are not compatible, I am fine with that. Though, I have a feeling that I am definitely not the only one with a list this long of reasons why I lie…. I’m just one of the rare ones to honestly give myself away….