It’s different this time around. I’m really at peace with Cyndal’s passing. She lived a good long life and passed peacefully.
I went on a walk finally around the neighborhood past so many of our usual spots. I was bombarded by visions of her all over from my memories. So many wonderful memories of time spent walking my dog. All of them really.
I can see Lula running for the ball at the park while Cyndal sniffs for squirrels. Dana greeting me on my way home from elementary school then again old laying on the corner waiting for dad to come pick us up. Cyndal also had those moments where we would walk until she couldn’t walk anymore then I’d call home for a ride.
I can see Cyndals last walk with me in front of the school where she couldn’t even make it 40 feet without difficulty breathing, but around the corner there I am running with her across the grass in a fit of freedom. She’s chasing the lazer at midnight, Lula and Tabby are there too.
We have a pack of dogs in heaven sending me memories. In real terms it is some sort of ptsd flashbacks, but I like to think she’s still trying to get me to chase her around the coffee table when I get home.