Tag Archives: enough money

My written goals

My written goals


3-5 years: To work internationally for an Orange County/LA based financial firm while earning enough money to cover family expenses as well as amass wealth.

5-10 years: Begin moving into business for myself based on large, institutional size clients while having fun investing my wealth.

10-20 years and beyond: Cruise on all the building I’ve done to consistently beat client expectations while using my wealth to help my extended family.  Also be prevalent in the philanthropic societies all over the world.

Education/Professional Development

Pursue some sort of professional certification relevant to the line of work I end up in.

Volunteer Community Service

Yes, participate in these types of activities assuming they are in line with my personal value system.  Perhaps one day start a free Dog owner training program that teaches people ethical treatment of their pets.


Stay devoted to my parents.  Find a supportive and reliable husband who has the same values to have healthy kids and a white picket fence with, etc. etc.

Health and physical condition

Stay in shape, eat well, and continue to belly dance and do yoga.  Also establish better habit when living in foreign countries and traveling.


Get rich/wealthy and stay rich/wealthy.  Practice sound financial planning and teach others how to avoid them draining me dry.  Maintain net worth of +1 million.

Hobbies and Pleasure

Win a belly dance competition, buy a bunch of profitable properties to furnish and decorate for tenants, buy a boat, buy a new motor home for my parents, support my husband’s interests, travel the world as often as possible and make a profit while doing it, add more to this list as needed.

On Mixed Emotions and Anger as Unfulfilled Desire

On Mixed Emotions and Anger as Unfulfilled Desire

While listening to ‘The Wind’ by Cat Stevens and organizing the sewing room – which is a huge huge project – I was thinking about my life (as I tend to do every minute I find a distraction that doesn’t require socializing) and following down my internal checklist of ‘happiness with myself’ and making mental notes of how I could have better handled certain past situations that are probably of highly insignificant value to most others, but I try to get detailed in my behavior so as not to confuse others on my intentions, but uh…I can’t seem to manage this, I seem to be running a program in opposition to what I really feel. This ‘program’ of reactions really only happens when a select few emotions are in the dominate forefront of my life. For example, since I’ve been home I have this cloud of anger hovering over me. Sure at times I feel happy or excited or content or any other emotion that isn’t compatible with anger, but that unfulfilled desire, that hole of not getting or being able to grasp what I had set my heart on, bubbles up from time to time and causes me to do all sorts of strange behaviors that are seemingly unconnected to anything in the present moment.

Someone once told me that it is ‘crazy’ to cry at things like an aluminum coke can flying onto the hood of my car on the freeway. After assessing that the damage was barely noticeable, I admit, the tears were perhaps unnecessary, but they were the bubbling up of my ‘fear’ of having to drive a shitty looking car around because, at the time, I, didn’t have enough money to fix it. Now I realize that, no, I’m not crazy, I’m just more emotional about things I care about and spend a lot of effort taking care of. There is nothing wrong with that, I just need to save the tears for more empathetic company, which I was really good at, but I just thought, in this instance, I was safe to display my real emotions. Or perhaps I just wanted to feel safe and more connected by doing so, so I gave it a try.

Now the real issue is, what is wrong with driving a shitty looking car around? That type of thinking escaped me in the moment; my arrogance perhaps needed a bit of a tune down.

So, to sum it up: emotions like fear, anger, happiness, etc. sometimes hold a dominate grasp on different chunks of time in life, get out of control because they are stronger for the time, bubble out, and leave me trying to explain how I have been misunderstood. After-the-fact explaining gets difficult because there tends to be many, many things going on in the mind in split seconds that really have no words, at least not until years later.